I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
Randomize