never play flip cup with pint glasses
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Randomize