Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Randomize
