He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
