seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Randomize
