I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Your penis caused this!
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
