This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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