I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
