Have you finally orgasmed yet?
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Randomize
