Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
