I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
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