you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
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