just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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