what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Randomize
