he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
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