We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
