You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
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