So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
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