wat bout pragnant strippers??
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Randomize
