Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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