Whats the glycemic index on semen?
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
