It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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