I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Randomize
