Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
Randomize
