if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
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