When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
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