Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
