found the other keg... it's in the tree
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
