hotel room ftw
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
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