How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
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