There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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