Screwed.edu
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
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