There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
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