i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
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