You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
