Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
