can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
Randomize