Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I still have a little drunk in my system
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
well, you know. whores of a feather.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
