I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
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