sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Randomize
