Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I have feelings that need drinking.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
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