I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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