we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Randomize
