I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
Randomize
