Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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