why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
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