Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
