Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
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