blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
I would ride that face into the sunset
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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