The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Randomize